Shafiq is Thirteen

Yesterday, 23rd August was my youngest child Shafiq's 13th birthday. And I feel so awful that I had forgotten about it yesterday. All of yesterday, I was on the island, attending a seminar on PDKs ( Pemulihan Dalam Komuniti or Rehabilitation in the Community). This is a centre for disabled children and adults, set up by the Social Welfare department, for the disabled within their own community. Most of the kids here were rejected by the Special Education section of the Education Ministry. The main reason was that, some of these kids were not capable of looking after themselves (meaning that they cannot handle them if they wet or dirty themselves). Shafiq attended one of those classes when he was seven. But each time I went to pick him up, after school, I would find him wet or dirty. They never changed his diapers. Even though we provided enough spare diapers, a towel and change of clothes. After a few months, my wife and I decided to send him back to the PDK. He had attended the PDK since he was six, instead of kindy. At least the PDK teacher was more caring than those specialist teachers. Well, he's a big boy now. Good looking and very neat. He is not wearing diapers anymore. He can control his bladder during class. When at home, if he feels like peeing or pooping, he would go to the bathroom and take a bath, fully clothed. After soaking himself, he will strip off his clothes, do his business and continue with his 'hosing' bath. His mum or dad got to soap him up, and let him continue his bath. He will be 'showering' four or five times a day. As for dressing, he likes the comfortable soft worn out ones. He hates the new crispy clothes. And no collared shirts please. The only collared shirts he wears is his uniform. He is very particular about his footwear. If the slipper or sandal straps burst and if his feet outgrows them, we got to find the same design,color as the old one. Those mentioned are some of Shafiq's 'quirks' and habits , we the family has to learn to accept.Its not easy to change him. He does'nt want to change. I'm sorry son, I forgot your birthday. Promise I'll make up to you. (Lina says sorry too, she also forgot your birthday).